Happy New Year. Yeah, it’s my first time writing you this year. And I believe you’ve started breaking new grounds already.
I have so much burdens on my heart about singles, and even though I struggled as to whether to share this post or not, I sense I should not hold back.
So, permit me to write from my heart to you. It might sound a bit directed at ladies but the guys have theirs to learn too.
These are 4 + 1 important things you need to know this year.
1. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you for being single. I wish I can just scream it into your ears. How can you be worrying so much because you don’t have a boyfriend or that nobody is asking you out as a lady? I know we ladies are very soft. But I also know that we are strong.
Never you think something is wrong with you and that’s the reason nobody is asking you out.
The last time I checked, we don’t receive any medal for having 20 boys ask us out in a month or something. So before you start giving yourself a problem that God hasn’t given to you, please delete that mindset.
There are so many problems we have drawn to our lives because of what we confess about ourselves.
2. Your being single means time to build capacity. To be sincere with you, if we can put the energy we exert by worrying about having a boyfriend into developing entrepreneurial skills, doing internships or just focusing on something worth while. We’d find out we are better people not sorry people.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying it’s not good to have someone in your life, but I have a problem with you when it becomes that one thing you pray about, fast about, talk about.
Let me ask you this:
The man you have been praying to have, when he finally comes, can you keep sexual purity?
How many times have you prayed for your future home?
What book have you read about relationship?
How do you intend to manage your relationship and did you learn any lesson from the previous ones you failed in?
I wish you know how much drama you’re free from and just enjoy your single hood.
When the man comes – fine, if he still doesn’t – Glory to God.
And this goes for guys too. Instead of trying different girls only to be dumping them one after the other. Please, just wait for that one.
I’m not talking like someone who has it all together. But I’m sharing the things I am also learning on my journey. Both from mistakes and hard lessons.
3. Your being single means time for deeper fellowship with God. Have you seen married people with 3 children? You think is funny, like you can just marry, give birth and you’ll have all the time in the world like you use to? Sorry to burst your bubble. Wake up girl. Wake up bro.
When I ended my last relationship with my ex in September, 2017 it felt like a burden was lifted off my life. I got direction for my life. For once, when I was with him, I thought my life was heading for a particular direction not knowing I didn’t even know who I was. I was making his life my own pathway.
I just pray you’d understand these things I’m saying.
Now you have all the time in the whole world. Please, get to know God for yourself. Not just going to church.
4. Being single means time to ask for direction from God and find out your purpose.
People that have been praying 12 hours daily have not been able to fully define what’s God purpose for their life not to talk of someone who is not even worried.
Purpose unfolds daily as we journey with God through this life.
Then why can’t we devote our single hood to this, and do it cause our life truly depends on it.
Do you have a picture of God’s picture for your future?
I don’t know. I feel like crying cause I have tears in my eyes already. But I don’t seem to understand we youth of these days. Myself inclusive. How can we be living life without a direction, focus, purpose, pursuit or vision.
How can you not even have a serious pattern for your life.
Okay, let’s say God is even far. What pattern or vision do you have for your life?
Which area is God directing you to? In business, education, ministry, etc.
We are not goats!!! God has a direction for our life.
I don’t even know if using goat was proper for what I wanted to pass, but you understand what i mean. Even robots have direction. They have been programmed.
5. Your being single means time to cause positive disruptions, make impact and be known for something.
If you wait till you’re married before putting your mark on the space of time, then I doubt if you’d get the chance to. Because by then, you don’t make decisions on your own. You have other shareholders/stakeholders ( husband and possibly children).
It’s not time for “My mates are getting married, me too I must marry”.
Can we just become people of innovations rather than marriage here and there.
( Is good to marry o. In fact, I will come for your wedding and you will come for mine.)
But is it your season?
I have a friend who hates to hear people ask him about his girlfriend or talk about his marriage plans. Not like he doesn’t have it in mind, but it’s just not the first right now.
Don’t say I told you not to marry o. Sister, Brother, know your time!!!
I think it’s time to hang my boot. And in case you probably didn’t get the message I was trying to pass, don’t hesitate to reach out to me.
I just believe this is the season for us to step out to do great things and stop sulking around with things that would come naturally if we just get busy with our purpose.
I love this family,
PS: You know I like sharing with you all. Why not return the favour by doing same. Comment, share, and like.
You deserve a gift for reading to the end. Kisses.